- Go on record speaking against the violence, and denouncing all relationship to the pledge.
- Form committee of all fraternity leaders to campaign against key safety issues on campus, namely Rape, and Drugs and Alcohol Abuse, and Violence to ensure campus safety.
- Mandatory orientation for all incoming freshmen that is organized and run by the fraternity.
- Fraternity’s run their own mini-PR campaign to improve their image on campus, and to promote more responsible members and behaviors.
- Meet with Dante every two weeks to review the campus crime reports with hope to be able to better address issues.
- Keep secret, if not what did you disclose? How/Why?
- Did you learn anything about the other side that would change your estimation?
- What was most important for OTHER side, distributive/integrative?
- If integrative, which ones?
- What was most important for YOUR side, distributive/integrative?
- If integrative, which ones?
- What did you learn about yourself as a negotiator?
- Is there anything you will try to do differently based on this negotiation experience?
Kept all secret. He hid the fact that he was passed out drunk and that the party was for him. Essentially he lied.
He was forthcoming and helpful, and devious. I didn’t realize that he was lying to me, though I was hard and did have my guard up.
He wanted to finish up school and not jeopardize his getting into Law school.
I wanted to solve the larger problem of crime and violence on campus more so than just responding to this particular incident. Also I don’t believe that Dante himself is in anyway libel from the school’s standpoint.
I learned that I can go into a negotiation with a fixed outcome in mind and might miss the bigger issues that could be hiding. Or maybe I should say the issues that you should uncover. Because of the last negotiation I spent the majority of our time interviewing him, asking the same questions at times in different ways to find new answers. I had asked about what he was doing that night, was he at the party, and he lied to me. He said that he knew it was going on, but had studied all day and took the LSATs (or some test) and had gone upstairs (to the third floor) to pass out asleep because he was so tired. I pushed a little on that (because wouldn’t he be bothered by the noiseâ€¦ ‘it was the third floor’) but in the end I believed him, and I was duped.
I have learned to be careful of being naive, and this is the first time I’ve been taken advantage of. All other negotiations (in the classroom, as well as in real life) that people have always been honest. Sure there are times when people may leave out information, but this, in my mind, was a straight out lie.
So what I learned is that I can be quelled into believing a story when I’m not alert to the risk. I should have realized that I should be suspicious of Dante and his antics with the comment on the end of the prep form about not expecting him to be any different from the rest of the frat boys that I knew, however I took this as a hint that the Dean was a bit biased and shouldn’t be.
Just being more aware and pushing to get the real facts. Who knows what the other person’s story really is, and sometimes what you don’t know is very relevant to the possible or optimal outcome of the negotiation. Sometimes there might be information that isn’t as relevant, but it’s still good to know as much as you can possibly get out of the other person. It’s enlightening to hear what the other side had on their facts after the negotiation to see what you were up against and to gauge how well you did on interviewing. This one shocked me. The previous negotiation, the Sunny Destinations Resort, also shocked me because it would have been very easy to come to a mutually beneficial negotiated agreement.
Also I would be sure to be aware that what the other person might be saying isn’t truthful. Of course I don’t expect that people are always honest by any means, but I haven’t really thought about being alert to absolute lies. I feel like I was naÃ¯ve in trusting him at his word, and believing him. And I realize how close I came to not even asking him questions that would have entered into that area. So it’s a thing for me to think about asking questions that branch out into broader areas of discovery.